Hot Coals

Well excuse me
for these pent up words
and my long winded laments,
for I have forgotten to realize
that you hardly care.

And pardon me,
for mentioning these memories I relive
retrace, reveal, remember,
for it is only now that I see,
that you don't think of me at all.

And how can you sleep
with the knowingness of guilt?
and how can you dream
when I can hardly shut my eyes?

You're still stopping and blocking, and locking me up.
You're pushing and pulling, and holding me down.
You're breathing and scheming, and feeding me lies,
You're unaware, godless, and convinced of my demise.

But do you not know me?
Do you not know who I am?
You have not chosen some small child
or some silent lamb, so easily led,
but rather a conqueror so bent
on seeing a heavenly, divine justice.
You owned the hand that fed me,
and it is your poison I now reject,
And as my teeth sink further into your flesh,
I can muster up nothing that looks like regret.

Small Town Heart

One day I will live here.
Or at least somewhere that's like this.
I was never created for the bustle and the noise, I was created for the silence, and the beauty found in wilderness.
I was made for the safety found in knowing everyone's names.
I was made for serving those who walk the same streets I do, day in and day out.
The Small Town calls my name, and it's the same voice that called me to live each moment for a Great Creator.
He has created my heart to dwell in the quaint.
Call me simple if you please, but call me happy also.
Call me simple, because maybe I am.

Rambling

Unfair, how the very same words are said,
to mean entirely different things,
and how cruel it is for you to sit there,
watching me try to figure it out.
All I ever did was make my way through,
the barricades that eventually led me here,
and all I get for my hard work
is the uncertainty I longed to be rid of.
Let me go, let me go, let me go.