The Curtain Puller

I can't say that I've figured it out yet.
I wish I could ease your guilt, but I can't lie
You said these weeks would heal,
But I have yet to feel that knife leave my spine,
Holding on to every wasted emotion I have.
I take my place behind the curtain,
While you take center stage,
And as graceful as I'd like to be,
I feel no jealousy, just loss.
Never, will I be that star you're looking for,
Though I thought maybe this time I could shine. . .
You see my eyes averted,
You see my identity, bare and uncovered,
But it's not enough.
It's just not enough.
You see everything,
But sometimes I just wish you'd see me as beautiful.